Faux Fox Fiasco
(A recent news report says that millions of government dollars spent in eradicating foxes from Tasmania may have been wasted, because there is little credible evidence that foxes have even reached Tasmania … )
They seek them here
they seek them there
they seek those foxes everywhere!
are they in Tassie,
or are they not?
those demmed elusive foxes
have us all on the trot!
Fifty million to find them
or keep them over the sea
fifty million to make quite sure
Tassie remains fox free.
But now there are whispers and rumours
that all is not quite right
fox scats are false
eyewitnesses done a waltz
and disappeared into the night.
"Tassie is fox-less, Tassie is pure!
This big fox hunt is a rip off!"
so the whistleblowers crow,
and the fraudsters know
their pockets are richer
despite the tip-off.
So police might probe
and public servants may tremble
that fox dollars are wasted and useless,
Tassie foxes and tigers may no longer be rumbled
and the hunt for them both just as clueless.
But when the nights are cold and foggy
and eerie howls pierce the murk,
don't look for foxes beyond your gate
it's only government auditors bewailing their fate
and weary taxpayers crying "what the f*%#!"
(With apologies, so far as the first stanza is concerned, to Baroness Orczy.)